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Before diving into a relationship, find out if your prospective partner is actively using drugs or alcohol, or if they display addictive or compulsive patterns in other areas (e.g., gambling, work, sex, food or spending).If you care about someone in active addiction, help them into treatment and hold off on turning a friendship into more until they’re grounded in their recovery.

Are they actively working a program of recovery (e.g., participating in self-help support meetings, counseling or an aftercare program)?Someone with less than a year sober should stay focused on their recovery program, not dating.This guideline is designed to protect the addict as well as the people they might date.Although these are not necessarily deal-breakers, you need to know that their problems can become your problems.If you can’t accept what was, you may not be the right person to accompany them through what is and what will be.

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